The Five Spot: Miss Piggy, Keanu Reeves, And Golden Toilets

Oh look, a headline that sums up this entire newsletter's existence.

'The Lowdown' Was So Good

Just an incredible piece of television.

The Five Spot: Jesse Plemons, A Rental Car Flim-Flam, And Tom Cruise Getting Annoyed

"How can that be profitable for Frito-Lay?"

Cell Phone Companies Will Not Stop Sending Celebrities To The Middle Of Nowhere

I need this to keep escalating.

The Five Spot: David Chase, Lego Looters, And Rhea Seehorn Asking For A Bazooka

GIVE RHEA SEEHORN A BAZOOKA

LOUVRE HEIST TOP FIVE

Counting down my favorite things about the most important story in the world.

The Five Spot: Rihanna, Channing Tatum, And Vin Diesel Contemplating the Ocean

Also, a truly incredible moment of television.

Why Is This Line From 'The Chair Company' Stuck In My Head?

Now here's a show that looks good so far.

The Five Spot: Chalamet's Ping Pong Skills, Ocean's Sequels And/Or Prequels, And My Secret AI Wife

Lots to cover this week, some of it both surreal and kind of hilarous.

The Theft Of Guy Fieri's Tequila Is Now A Matter Of National Importance

[extremely newscaster voice] we're rollin' out...

The Five Spot: Dewey Cox, Pints Of Red Bull, And A Few Small Beers

A surprising amount of beverage discussion this week.

Reasons To Go See 'One Battle After Another,' Ranked

Top ten, here we go... TEN: It is a three-hour movie that deals with heavyyyyyy political themes related to Our Current Moment In Time and yet it still absolutely breezes by, especially in its second and third acts when all the foundation settles into place and the action propels itself