some things from action movies I would like to do in 2025
this list was easy to make. almost... too easy...
In no particular order:
— learn something from a chatty driver that proves to be useful later
— have someone ask me for help with a big project and then look them in the eye and tell them I’m retired
— end up doing this one last job anyway after they insist it has to be me because I’m the best who ever did it
— use the phrase “get me the schematics”
— get chewed out by a gruff superior for my loose-cannon shenanigans
— have the same gruff superior later admit that while my methods are unorthodox I still get results, dammit
— attend a secret auction in a mansion hosted by a mysterious woman with an unplaceable accent
— slip a cell phone into someone’s pocket when they’re not looking and then call the phone a few minutes later to tell them something that wasn’t safe to share in person
— end a phone call and then immediately snap my flip phone in half and then toss the two pieces into separate dumpsters
— snoop around a warehouse while funky music plays in the background
— tell a police officer that he needs to release me because there’s a larger plot afoot that he doesn’t see
— access a hidden room using a retina scanner
— unlock an incapacitated colleague’s phone in an emergency by using their Face ID
— think I have an adversary cornered only to have him escape using parkour
— know someone who goes by The Barracuda
— uncover a plot that takes down the fat cats in city hall
— have a sinister businessman reveal his plot to me in a long monologue delivered from a desk with a tank filled with exotic fish behind it
— wear an overcoat draped on top of my shoulders with my arms not in the sleeves like an evil tycoon
— crash a gala
— initiate ghost protocol
— find out if my van can drift around corners
— tell someone that even though our goals and methods appear to be at odds, we are not so different, actually
— do the thing from the Bourne movies where I end a phone call with someone by telling them they “look tired” and thus revealing that I’ve been nearby and watching them the whole time
— use binoculars more, just generally
— hide a valuable piece of information inside a book that has been hollowed out
— find a hidden compartment in a desk that contains nothing but an unmarked flash drive
— watch an airplane soar off into the sunset and smile knowingly in a way that implies I know who is on it and where they are going
These seem like a reasonable place to start.
STUFF I TYPED
— Vulture let me empty out my screencaps folder to hand out some very silly TV awards
— wrote about news bloopers, which I adore
STUFF I CLICKED ON
— good interview with Bill Lawrence about Shrinking, a show I enjoy
— fascinating story about the woman who controls the Bond franchise — Barbara Broccoli, great name — just being a huge thorn in Amazon’s side as they try to turn it into content
— cackled the whole way through Defector’s annual accounting of groin-related injuries
— settle in for a great long Adam Scott profile
— a really good blog about the value of being bored
— hard to explain how excited I am about the Abbott/Sunny crossover, which Alan Sepinwall spoke to Quinta Brunson about
— a dude from New York found a whole-ass mastodon jaw
— the world’s most prominent flat-earther traveled to Antarctica and proceeded to get wrecked by the sun
— look at this picture of Muggsy Bogues standing next to Gheorghe Muresan
— learned about the fundamental attribution error
— a missing dog showed up at his owner’s house and rang the doorbell
— RIP to the real-life donkey who inspired the cartoon donkey from Shrek
— “Baby spider monkey wearing onesie in Rolls Royce finds permanent California home”
— “World chess number one Magnus Carlsen quits tournament after refusing to change jeans”
— incredible work from Rodger Sherman on one of the weirdest things I’ve ever seen in a football game
— let’s buy the Breaking Bad house
— I refuse to explain this but go birds
Okay, that’s it for this week. Please share and subscribe and hire me to do one last job.
