My Pretty Good(...ish) White Lotus Casting Suggestions
Listen to me.
Earlier this week, for reasons that remain unclear but I must know immediately, HBO’s hit series The White Lotus replaced Helena Bonham Carter with Laura Dern for the upcoming season, despite the casting being all announced and official just a few weeks ago. This is interesting on many levels, not the least of which being the mental image of Laura Dern playing a character originally written for Helena Bonham Carter. That’s not what's happening here, though. Creator Mike White is scrapping the original character and writing a new one for Laura Dern. Which is a bummer, in a way. I think I would’ve enjoyed seeing Laura Dern go goth as hell in a fancy French hotel for a season of television.
Anyway, this little emergency casting flip-flop led to me, once again, spending way too much time thinking about other potential casting suggestions for an upcoming season of The White Lotus. My general rule with these kinds of things remains “if I’m thinking about it for more than an hour or two, I should just turn it into a blog so it counts as work,” so, presented with further blabbering, here are some ideas I had about who I would like to see book a room in a White Lotus resort in a future season of the show.
- Tracy Morgan
- Ian McShane
- Maya Rudolph
- Olivia Colman
- Miss Piggy
- Nick Offerman
- Jane Krakowski
- Arthur Shelby from Peaky Blinders (the character, not the actor who plays him)
- Salma Hayek
- Jeff Goldblum
- Sam Neill
- A velociraptor
- Jason Mantzoukas
- Tramell Tillman
- Meg Stalter
- Rocky the Alien from Project Hail Mary
- Chelsea Peretti
- Eric Roberts
- James Spader
- Diana Taurasi
- Lalo Salamanca from Better Call Saul (the character, not the actor who plays him)
- Linda Cardellini
- Tommy Lee Jones
- Method Man and/or Redman
- Lucy Liu
- Stone Cold Steve Austin
- Shooter McGavin from Happy Gilmore (the character, not the actor who plays him)
Thank you.
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STUFF I CLICKED ON
— cool interview with Bob Odenkirk, a guy who seems to have his head on straight
— Mike Ryan interviewed Jorma Taccone
— terrific blog by Tara Ariano about The Rockford Files, a show that still rules 50 years after it premiered
— Jacob Oller put the new Animal Farm movie into a meat grinder
— wild headline that somehow undersells the story: “He laughed so hard at Koo’s botched NFL kick that he had a seizure. It may have saved his life”
— buddy, I am definitely gonna cry during the last Jackass movie
— good Wirecutter blog on dumpster diving
— I’m kinda psyched for the John Wick spinoff about Donnie Yen’s character
— insane Jay Leno wax figure up for auction
— still wild to me that my fav Sixers podcaster wrote a movie that will star Emma Stone
— Sonia Saraiya wrote a great thing about reassessing Lena Dunham and Girls many years later
— “Hot air balloon with 13 aboard makes emergency landing in California backyard”
— “‘Girl power’: Women hunt burglars, find suspect wearing their stolen clothes”
— the Sixers and Flyers both played home playoff games last weekend, which led me back to the sped-up version of arena staff switching the floor from ice to hoops
Okay, that’s it for this week. Please share and subscribe and tell Mike White I have good ideas.
